September 03, 2016

So What's Happened?

What's occurred since we've been away?

  • Metal went through a good period in 2014, but has dropped generally somewhat this year and nearing it. Unfortunate.
  • Britain voted to exit the European Union.
  • John Cyriis, likewise, disappeared. Perhaps the aliens got him.
  • A vicar was recently sacked, 'for throwing live foxcubs to a pack of hounds.' Parables just don't come easy these days.
  • Fates Warning released an album named 'Theories of Flight.' Death to False Birds.
  •  Indie-pop is now a thing, so I guess that's unfortunate for alt rock. Nobody has the time to show attitude now, because they're all too busy being happy about whatever. Alt rock is dead, it seems. Avril Lavigne won. Run for the hills, run for your life.
  • Some show named 'Duck Dynasty' was around, but so far it has been found wanting as theories of flight go. No wonder people are so offended.
  • People in the West are being terrorised. Well, it's too late now, terrorising them is now a part of their culture, which was otherwise quite noticeably static.
  • Hollywood continues to turn fields into something completely different. 'Hands of Stone,' a boxing film, might seem likely to be about boxing, but as the trailer helpfully notes it is actually about people being paid to engage in sexual activities. So, like, if you're not into that, do something else. Listen to prog records which happen to be long concept albums. Hint. (Alright that was highly unsubtle.)
  • Jag Panzer have played a show named 'The Big Ample.' This seems highly unflattering. They should have just let Edgar Ramirez do that.
  • Eye to eye, and the miles still divide. We can move each other to tears, yet we can't see eye to eye.
  • Rap has changed. It's gone from attempting depth to shallowness to giving up entirely and becoming a 'wing' of the Kardashians' show. Por qué?
  • Adramelch released an album named 'Opus.' Clearly this is a monumental record, as I can say without any regard to the music in the album (this is how one reviews records, right?). Honestly, picking up an album with a sullen name like 'Irae Melanox' and then it opening with this whole gothic, mediaeval thing would have seemed slightly eerie as it were, although they occasionally tried to limit that.
  • The shark from Jaws has not stood in any election this year. (You can ignore all of the elections, then.) This along with all the religions turning a cold shoulder to them. We need a first shark President.
  • Death metal now has more DEATH, and more EXCITEMENT. What are you waiting for? (We should add this to every post, then this page will seem normal.)

1 comment:

Rage for Order said...

"A vicar was recently sacked, 'for throwing live foxcubs to a pack of hounds.' Parables just don't come easy these days."

LOL!

You linked me here, you dont have to have a Blogger account to post??